Little did I know that the foster baby would be an easier feat. This dog drives me nuts! Whose idea was this?
We took her to puppy boot camp right away. You are laughing aren't you? I am serious. The Perfect Pooch is bar none the coolest place around. You drop them off holy terrors and Dave gives them back 10 days later and VOILA, your very own perfect pooch. She was an ace and to this day is a fantastic dog - for my husband. It's that whole Alpha Male thing.
Quite honestly, the last three years it has been crazy as she is just a big black 80 pound toddler! When the baby came - I could have more easily dealt with twins, I think. She has disciplinary issues and I think should get Occupational Therapy during my son's sessions. She's a mess.
Anyway, almost 2 years ago, I
demanded suggested we get one of those buried fences. I was tired of carrying the baby out in the elements 1400 times a day and walking around waiting for Morgan to "go." Really? As a mom, do you have time to do this? I was so ready to just buy a big fat CORK and tell her she had to wait until "Daddy" got home. It would be the dead of winter and snow would be blowing, I would get the baby situated on a play mat after getting the older two kids on the bus, I would sit down with a hot cup of tea and Morgan would come bounding in, knock over my cup into my lap and start whining - she had to pee. I would have to put the baby in his Siberian excursion outerwear and take him out to stand and wait...and walk...and sniff... I WANTED TO SCREAM!
So, the $200 was well-spent for the buried fence as I deemed it a necessity!
Are you doing the math? We got her in 2005, bought the fence in 2006 and it is 2008. Ask me how I am enjoying that fence...go ahead, ask me.
Thanks for asking but this is a real sore subject as that $200 box is still sitting on a shelf in our garage. (go ahead, ladies, re-read it, I know it is hard to believe) STILL SITTING ON THE SHELF. The dog has been trained to the collar that was in the box- but still no fence!
Please keep in mind, I am a very gentle person - we don't even spank in our house - so this shock-thing bothered me for a long time; hence the whole year of freezing my fanny off taking her out myself. I even
made suggested my husband try it on himself before putting it on the dog. I said it was inhumane to give her a shock without knowing how bad it was. He tried it (on his hand, not his neck), I watched and he assured me it was "like sticking your tongue on a 9 volt battery." OK. Who does this? Maybe it is a guy-thing, but I have never had the urge to lick an Energizer! I don't get it!
Anyway, after a couple months and no fence, I boycotted scooping her poop. My excuse? I said, I was not about to brave the elements with a baby on my hip AND be expected to also use a bag to fondle her feces, too. Not happening! I just wanted to be able to open the door and let her out.
My poor children get dragged into this during lawn-maintenance season because my husband will call from the lawnmower, "Got grab some bags and scoop the poop!" My mom-ears can hear that request even with the windows closed and the mower running and I run to their aid. They both have that intense gag reflex that causes them to heave at the slightest disgust. Asking them to feel warm poo through a thin WalMart bag is just not right! Not to mention, my husband should feel for them as he puked IN HIS MOUTH numerous times while changing diapers. They all share the gag-thing!
He says now that he is waiting for me to decide to start picking up the poop before he puts in the fence b/c otherwise the WHOLE yard (instead of just the curb) will be crap-laden. Ugh. My plan has back-fired!
Why do I talk about poop today? Because this morning I found myself moved to scoop ALL of this winter's poop out of our curb grass while my little one played in the driveway with sidewalk chalk. It was starting to look like we had decided to use Doggy-Doo Mulch to cover our grass on the curb, I was a wee but embarrassed as many runners take their early morning jaunt right passed our house - that has to be gross! They have to notice it.
No, I don't deserve an award, I think I miss my man. He is headed back from a snowmobiling adventure out West with his dad and I miss him; did I say that? So, my boycott has ended, I guess, for now. I still want the fence put in but in the whole scheme of things, it's really not that big of a deal.
See Ken, I will even scoop the poo for you! Smooches!
And the dog? Yeah, she's still a big dork.Yes, that IS a pumpkin!