I am a blogging mom of three who sums up her chaotic days with humorous rants in between cleaning peanut butter off the ceiling fan and keeping my youngest occupied in the lazy Susan.
Put your feet up and laugh at me. My neighbors do!
I don't know about you but my house is like a FRIPPIN CIRCUS on most days! Somehow, probably because no one else wanted the job, I became the ringmaster. It's kind of like that phenomenon in gym class when the two popular kids get to pick teams and you are the last one picked. Well, apparently I am the least popular person in my house and I ended up with the proverbial shortest straw!
So, on any given day I wipe butts which I think is similar to the guy with the shovel that follows the elephants around. I try NOT to feed my kids as much fiber as an elephant so I can stay on top of that job. And only one is still in diapers so I think I am good. I think I got this down.
Because I can wipe a butt, make a sandwich, clean the toilet, feed the dog, do a craft, sing a song and talk on the phone all at the same time...I think I qualify for the resident ACROBAT as well. Oh, that's just great...RINGMASTER AND ACROBAT...is NO ONE ELSE qualified for either of these jobs? Let me gather their resumes...
kid #1 - um, no...
kid #2 - nope...
kid #3 - yeah, right...
my dear hubby - BWAAAA HAAAA snort giggle giggle! Crap! It really IS all on me!
So, I was left to deal with the following things (and the reason I have not been blogging) just this week.
We had an injury...
the alligator was wrestling with the kids and my youngest tried to feed him the Polly Pockets and "he bite bite!" At least that's the story I got.
It's a more exciting story than what really happened which was simply a 3 year-old finding the tape in the junk drawer and pulling the end for all he was worth. While chasing him around the island in the kitchen and around the table and into the living room the tape wrapped itself around his flailing arms! Not funny. If it wouldn't have been cutting off the circulation to his hand I would have made him keep it on to show him it was a silly idea. And, it may have kept him still as he would have STUCK to something and I could have finished dinner.
Then there was the flood... In the kitchen. While I was otheriwse occupied and only a few steps away my son decided to play Noah without his ark. He was innocently playing in the sink which keeps him occupied and he loves it and is usually good about NOT making a mess (except for that one time when he realized the faucet is actually a hose you can pull out and aim). Today, he chose a coffee mug as his weapon and he filled and dumped. Apparently he dumped a couple times but because I had a towel on the floor I didn't hear the splat. I didn't hear until the WAVE came!
Apple Coring 101... was, I thought, my breaking point this day (did I mention this all happened within 30 minutes? *twitch twitch*). I was a cool mom and made craft/drawing supplies available so that after I finished "parting the SEA" I could get dinner on the table. I had also supplied a healthy snack. His favorite. "Bapple!"
Then I had to make the birthday cake for my oldest's (still scarred by the sex talk - scroll down to read that) 11th birthday.
Wait...where did that extra piece come from?
You have GOT the be kidding me! Nice. Perfect ending to a perfect day! NOT!
Tell me about your life IN THE CIRCUS and what position at the circus you feel you are most worthy of...tightrope walker, the lion tamer, sideshow freak, trapeze artist, clown, the audience...did I miss anything?
The best "quote" or scenario will win this book.
Sidewalk Circus is a gorgeous wordless book about the anticipation of the coming circus. It is a Blue Ribbon Picture Book Award winner. By Paul Fleischman (Author), Kevin Hawkes (Illustrator)
And as always...refer, link, post! Everyone is welcome!