Throughout the day when things go awry, I often think of my husband sitting in his comfy chair, in his quiet office as he jokes with a colleague.
I feel jealous some days as he walks leisurely out the door to his car while I am running around with my butt on fire making lunches, picking up friends to play, dropping off over-due library books and standing on my head entertaining 3 booooored kids.
I am often envious of his freedom to have lunch with someone who doesn't throw food or spit milk out his nose.
So, to help him feel involved in my day, I have started texting him. You know, I am sure he is wishing he was home to take in all the pleasures that I deal with each and every day. Maybe he is sitting at his desk wishing he was unshowered and wrestling a preschooler onto the potty seat. Maybe. Or maybe my texts are simply subliminal messages from which he better translate, "If you are one FRIPPIN' minute late getting home someone will be bouncing off the walls and it just may not be ME!"
I choose to keep him informed throughout the day with texts...it helps me
vent let him know how much I appreciate his hard work and it keeps him up to speed on how many dozen roses to bring home. It also keeps my fingers busy so I still don a headful of hair!
As we have all seen on the news...kids have their own texting shorthand, well feel free to grab what you need from this list!
ILU! - I love you!
T4aUdo! - Thanks for all you do!
TaWo.WUWH! - Taking a walk. WISH YOU WERE HERE!
HsfPfLwB! - Had smiley face pancakes for lunch with kids!
WaUCH? - When are you coming home?
G?WitP! - Guess what's in the potty!
SC! - School CALLED!
KHWiurC! - Kids homework - in your car!
SCA! - School CALLED AGAIN!
KLMiurC! - Kids lunch money in your car!
SFCA! - SCHOOL FRIPPIN' CALLED AGAIN!
TBPAIURC! - Their BACKPACKS are in YOUR CAR!
AUtaMCbaBHoT! - And you talk about MY car being a black hole of trash!
UG! TaSOurK! - Ugh! They are SOOOO your kids!!!
911!PBotFS! - HELP! Peanut butter on the flatscreen!
TBitT! - Toothbrush in the toilet!
IAA2LI! - I am about to lose it!
911!DHRA! - HELP! Diarrhea!
911!DHRA!LD! - HELP! Diarrhea! LAST DIAPER!
CHN! - Come Home NOW!
BW! - Bring WINE!
ItInRx! - I think I need MEDICATION!
IhstTWCH! - I have started to TWITCH!
WAUAMTXT?! - Why aren't you answering my texts?!
IIcmtlabIW! CHN! - If I could make these letters any bigger I WOULD! COME HOME NOW!
K,LS!911!KAH!NG!NG!BPZWaDOE! - OK, LAST STRAW! HELP! KIDS ALL HOME! NO GROCERIES! BRING PIZZA, WINE AND DIAPERS, OR ELSE!
Ct10! TiurLC! IudwttdwaDZr,aBPoDaMoWaaFPuwN( )A! - Counting to 10! This is your LAST CHANCE! If you don't walk through that door with a DOZEN roses, a bulk pack of diapers, a magnum of WINE and a FAT PIZZA you will NEVER (fill in blank) AGAIN!
"Honey, I'm home!"
Now, that's more like it!