Friday, May 7, 2010

Fed Up Friday!

Welcome to my 2nd installment of FED UP FRIDAY where I tell you the one thing (like there is only one) that is on my nerves this week!

I love being a writer. Blogging is an awesome release for a freelance writer. No one to tell you HOW LONG, HOW SHORT, WHAT STYLE or WHAT can write whatever you dang well please!

But, one thing that DOES get to me is the opinions of other people. I don't mind when they keep their thoughts to themselves - heck you can think whatever you want about my BUT DON'T TELL ME! LOL!

As a long time popular blogger, I have tried to grow a thicker skin. When I posted a lot about my support for Kate Gosselin I endured the salivation of KATE HATE BLOGS who would have whole posts about ME! The readers there would actually do searches and find everything about me and then flame everything I thought, did, said, felt, etc. I even had one person mention that I was such a Kate-stalker that I painted my kitchen the same color as, honestly, I had no idea until that comment what the hell color Kate's kitchen was! And, let's talk stalker....HOW THE SNOT DID THAT PERSON KNOW THE COLOR OF MY KITCHEN??! Shheesh!

So, I have dealt with really mean stuff in my comments and even the comments about me on other blogs..whatever...some people have way too much time on their hands and way too much hate in their hearts. Kinda sad.

I started writing for a little over a year ago and I LOVE IT! I share the blogging stage with Amy Brenneman, Karyn Bryant, Teresa Strasser...and so many more AMAZING writers. 

I throw out ideas of things I think moms would like to know about or would find humorous or interesting and sometimes my MomLogic editor will ask me to write things that are big news items. She knows my kids are in school for most of the day and I can usually turn an article around for her before the end of the day - it helps that she is in California because that, technically, gives me three more hours because of the time difference! Julie ROCKS, we really think on the same lines and I love writing for her.

Of course, when you write for any online magazine or newspaper, there is usually a comments section...well, here come the Grumpies! Those people who search out things they don't agree with, read them and then insist that the writer was trying to change their mind about something they are passionate about. I am SO OK with someone not agreeing with my parenting style, my opinions on adoption, my humorous spins on motherhood but some of these people are just downright hateful. It really makes you wonder WHO ever told them it was socially acceptable to be mean? Hmmmm, and we wonder where bullies come from?

Now, I will preface the following with...these people did not hurt my feelings, their comments did not phase me personally...the thing that is a thorn in my side is their audacity to make assumptions about my life based on a 250 word article I was asked to write and then flame me AND MY READERS who leave positive comments (WHICH ARE THEIR OPINION!).

Come's kinda finny...

I wrote an article about how strange kids programming can be...
...and I got this...

"If you don’t want your kids watching these show don’t demand better shows.

There is a simple solution to this.

TURN OFF THE TV, and play with your kids, teach them abstract imaginative thinking, broaden their cognitive skills, enhance their learning, and they will get exercise.

P.S. These shows seem so repetitive to you because they are meant for KIDS NOT for adults! Shows that you engage in, such as ‘Ellen’ are just as brain numbing - full of advertisements to get you to consume products in order to be “happy” by poking at your insecurities."

So, basically this woman got her panties in a wad and assumed my kids don't get anything creative in their lives because I plunk them down in front of the TV and then scoot them out when Ellen comes on. WTH? First of all, those of you who read my blog KNOW that my kids live with AN ART TEACHER...they get plenty of CREATIVE activity!! And, I love Ellen, but never get to watch her because I am OUTSIDE playing with my preschooler who is waiting for his big brother and sister's bus to get here. Guess she missed the part where I said, "I WAS HOME WITH A SICK KID ON THE COUCH ALL DAY..."

I wrote an article about my struggles as a mom of a special needs child with behavioral issues...

...and I got this...
"shut that kid up!!!!"

Wow! Do you know what this persons name was? "Anonymous" How convenient, if you are going to be intolerant you need to have the guts to leave a name. I felt so bad for all the commenters who were in the same boat I am and were using the comments to support each other.

I wrote an article about my experience having "The Talk" with my son...

...and I got this...

"Wow. I feel very sorry for your son, but also slightly hopeful that the poor kid is now so traumatized by the idea of sex that your screwed up ideas are not passed on to yet another generation. Unfortunately, nature and hormones will have their way, so when this boy hits puberty and becomes REALLY interested in sex he’s probably going to look back on this conversation and decide he’d much rather ask his friends any questions he has rather than risk another embarrassing conversation with his mother trying to gross him out.

If that turns out to be the case, in 4 or 5 years when you title an article “Damn Those Unplanned Teenage Pregnancies!”"
This person thinks the problem here is ME? Wow! My article was written in fun - hence the term "humor essay" - I can't even begin to list the untruths in this comment and I know I don't need to because...well, it's just not worth entertaining that kind of silliness.

And finally...
I was asked to write an article about our adoption and what I saw as the "pros" to adopting domestically (this was to play off all the positive press that Sandra Bullock was getting for her New Orleans adoption)...

...and I (and another reader who commented) got this...

"Unless you have visited a foreign orphanage and have seen the inhumane conditions under which these children are forced to live, you have no idea what you are talking about!

But, I guess we should not be so surprised at your ignorant comments , given the very ignorant and insensitive article they follow! Looks like Ms. Brownlow was too busy patting herself on the back to follow any solid journalistic practices! Has she ever adopted internationally? Did she interview any parents of internationally adopted children, in order to achieve a more objective article? Of course not!"

First off, I am sorry the other commenter had to deal with this woman's grumpies. Secondly, she made the assumption that only children in orphanages live in inhumane conditions? I will spare you the details but what I could tell you children endure before being put in foster care would haunt you for life. I am in no way COMPARING the two...children living in horrific situations need families to come to their rescue regardless of WHERE they are or to what extreme of horror they are living.

"Ignorant and insensitive..."
Wow! No comment.

Alright, my faithful readers! I hope you all know that I appreciate a good conversation, I enjoy hearing other views...must be that I just have the most mature readers in the blogosphere...we can agree to disagree.

Have an amazing weekend and say something NICE to someone today - it will counteract the comments of those who TRY to hurt people's feelings.



Julie Stiles Mills said...

I was going to comment on all the hateful, ignorant comments you quoted but I've already forgotten them. Probably because they aren't worth remembering. Life is bigger than those small little worlds.

You rock.

Brenda said...

I must be so naive. I am stunned to hear that people are so mean.