What's in your VIEWFINDER?

It was the 70’s version of the iPod. We all had one and traded the disks with our friends. “I’ll trade my Scooby-Doo for your Speed Racer!” I can still hear the crunch-slide sound of the handle advancing to the next frame. The View Master™. Very similar to binoculars in shape, this toy was good for hours of enjoyment as my cousins and I relived our favorite movies and cartoons frame-by-frame. The images on each slide were incredibly lifelike as they jumped off the plastic squares set inside the white cardboard disk. I am sure this toy was not meant to be life-changing but this week during a moment of nostalgia I was struck by a new view. Like the View Master™, can you maneuver a quick change? It is 3:55 pm and you have just walked in the door from work, ready to get the kids off the bus. As you enter, you realize something has gone completely awry. It appears as though the dog wasn’t in his crate when you locked it this morning in your mad rush out the door. As you can hear the dog’s whining coming from behind your youngest child’s bedroom door. As you walk closer toward the room you see a strange pattern in the living room rug that you had not noticed before. In a panic, you throw the door open and there is your mutt bounding around in a fluffy pile made up of one single strand of what used to be your living room carpet. One taste of a loose thread on the bedroom side of the door had that dog pulling for all he was worth – all the live-long day. You now own a visible illustration of the word ‘zigzag’ down the center of your family room rug. You sink to the floor imagining your spouse finding out about the “Incredible Unraveling Pooch” when your attention is diverted by, “Mom! Mom! I made the team/got the lead in the play/got an A on my test!” Crunch-slide Time for a quick change. Choose to be in the moment – the good one. Like the View Master™, can you look beyond the foreground? When my husband came home for lunch on Wednesday what he witnessed upon walking in the kitchen almost made his head turn inside out. There were six women sitting around our kitchen table and seven children darting over, under and through every bit of available space. Two two-year olds were screeching and pulling on opposite ends of a tricycle. One little one was skipping aimlessly and bumping into everything. A mom was giving her daughter an insulin shot while the girl’s two brothers took turns throwing a ball at our ceiling fan. And then there was the sweet little boy using a mallet to smash the bajeebies out of a cracker on the linoleum right at my husband’s feet. My husband chose to focus on the foreground. The women around his table were planning the Holiday Party for Berks County’s children in foster care. Over two hundred children will be treated to quite the event this December. These children who have been removed from their homes (albeit with their best interest in mind) will craft, dance, play and receive gifts and a visit from Santa. This happy day will create smiles on faces that may not have stretched in that direction for quite some time. They will reconnect with their innocence, something some of them lost way too soon. This apparent chaos was simply the background for something priceless. Like the View Master™, it might be time to change the disk. How many times did you crunch-slide through the “if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids” frame before you begged for a new disk? How many times could you stand to watch Speed Racer win before wanting to frisby-toss the disk across the room? How many times are you going to say, “I will never act that way/lose my temper/be so gullible again!”? How many times will you oversleep/be irresponsible/act disrespectfully? How many times can you stand to watch this disk you have come to know as your life? As Dr. Phil would say, “How’s that workin’ for ya?” You know it’s time to try something new, change your pattern or make a choice for the better, so do it! I am not sure why the View Master™ struck me this way after so many years but I believe many of us need to experience this new twist on a classic toy; one that evidently can teach a huge lesson. Everyday we need to know when to make a quick change, when to focus on the foreground and when to change for the better. Life’s too short to crunch-slide through the same old patterns. Change your disk, make a difference! ---------------------------o0o---------------------------- As always, I write to touch the lives of people I may never meet so if you enjoyed this post PLEASE FWD this link to those you think it could touch who may NOT stumble upon my blog otherwise. Thanks!

Allergic Reactions...

Last year at a specialty crepe restaurant in Philadelphia we found out our oldest child is quite allergic to Buckwheat. One bite of his first Buckwheat crepe caused us much concern as his tongue and throat became so itchy he could barely sit still. Then came the chest pains, the rash around his mouth, severe nausea and hives you would not believe. We now have a tanker of epinephrine and a truck load of Benadryl that follow us everywhere like that “network” you see on the cell phone commercials. Needless to say, allergic reactions have been in the forefront of my brain since then. So much so that I felt the need to identify a few of my own afflictions, their symptoms and my self-prescribed cures. I urge you to search out yours as well. Allergy #1: BAD ATTITUDES Symptoms: When coming in contact with said attitude a mild rash-like aversion may occur and will spread almost immediately. The “rash” begins to spread and before too long, it is an all-consuming power that overtakes one’s day. Soon even the most trivial of events or happenings brings one to a new height of frustration. If not treated, one’s attitude could be shot for the rest of the week. This allergy is quite dangerous to one’s well-being and those well-beings around them. Prescription: A long chat with a positive influence in one’s life. A good, uplifting book/article – preferably a spiritual one. A bare-it-all prayer with the Man upstairs. Allergy #2: CATTINESS Symptoms: Feelings of superiority and judgmental behaviors come on quickly. These feelings can escalate quite rapidly to the point of nose-held-high-in-the-air-itis. Like any addiction, this sense of entitlement can become quite habit-forming. For the most part these feelings erupt when one’s self-esteem is at its lowest. Dangerous levels of self-praise actions and impulses can spike at any time. Prescription: A long look I the mirror and a quiet afternoon with a pen and a journal. Self-searching to the point of brokenness and a huge box of tissues. And, of course, a bare-it-all prayer to the Man upstairs. Allergy #3: FEAR Symptoms:

Severe sensations of lack of control (LOC). The need to hold onto a person or a habit that only appears to be solid as one’s world forms a downward spiral. A tragic craving for something unidentifiable to hold it all together and the search to find it. Feelings of doubt, disconnect and paranoia may subside but the initial LOC sensations will remain. Prescription: The admission that something bigger is ultimately in control and the surrender of that control. A change of focus to all that is good, healthy and clean. The acceptance of one’s short-comings and the resolve to make a change for the better. And, once again, a bare-it-all prayer to the Man upstairs. The diagnosis: Your allergies may react to different triggers. Your symptoms may be more or less severe. But one thing remains the same…a prescription can only be determined by the person suffering the affliction. You can only hide under the covers for so long. It’s a brand new morning and the perfect time to stand at the mirror, look yourself right in the face and resolve to live your life to the fullest. Align your life with God’s Truth we find in Philippians 4:8, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Swallow a bottle of self-esteem. Take a few teaspoons of healthy pride. Rub some new focus into your sores and watch your life start anew. Of course, what kind of friend would I be if I didn’t also prescribe a boatload of love…take two and call me in the morning.

Contemplating Perfection...

If someone stopped me on the street corner and asked me to describe my own personal “prefect scenario” I am not sure what I would say; let me give it a try: *Some “Me time” that doesn’t include Bob the Builder, diapers or homework? *A healthy portion of amazingly delicious desserts that will not show themselves on my scale the next day? *A shirt that lasts all day with not an ounce of someone else’s bodily fluid sprayed, spit or flung on it? *A day where I do not have to utter the words, “Can you please STOP it?!” to each of the children, the dog and my husband? *One solid, straight-through-till-morning, back-pain-free sleep? *A hammock, my favorite magazine, a bit of chocolate, a drink with an umbrella and hours on end to enjoy it all. Oh, and the waiter to serve me, the maid to clean the stains from my shirts, the masseuse for my aching back and the Nanny to say, “Can you please stop it?” for me? That’s it. That’s what I would say! Michelle Kemper Brownlow has defined her vision of perfection, for today. It will change tomorrow. Isn’t that how it goes, though? We spend years of our lives striving for something- a bigger house, a better job, more money, an empty nest- only to find what we waited so long for doesn’t feel as good as we thought it would after all. When we find ourselves stuck in this rut of misconception, we need to sit down and contemplate perfection. My ‘perfect’ scenario sounds good and by golly it would feel good but it truly isn’t my idea of true perfection. It honestly changes everyday. Knowing that that is OK, is quite freeing. Society will tell us that fame, fortune and the perfect body ranks right up there on the “perfection” list but then I see poor souls like Lindsay Lohan, Michael Vick and Britney Spears as I scan the channels. If that’s what perfection looks like, keep it! I want no parts of it. The business world will tell you that dual salaries and a well-over six-figure income will fulfill your heart’s every desire. I look at the looming divorce rates of those who are fueled by the hunger for “more” and swiftly turn my back on the idea that any of them have found anything worth calling perfection. I read an article this week in Hallmark Magazine (thanks, Mom!) called “Letting Go of Perfect.” The gist of the article by Karen Houppert is to embrace your own perfection, not someone else’s idea of it and let that idea change from day to day. Today, my idea of true perfection may be spending an hour in a blanket-tussled bed that hasn’t been made for days with my husband and three children as they giggle listening to stories we have told a million times. After a busy day of church, home improvements and chasing the baby at a family reunion, my husband’s idea of perfection would most likely be similar to mine although he would prefer the bed neatly made with hospital corners. But sometimes close-enough-to-perfect is just as beautiful. In a world where even the food in a magazine has a stylist, we need a reality check every day. Sit down and make a list, I mean it – get out your paper...find a pen! Jot down everything in life that resembles perfection. My list goes something like this: · the sound of my children giggling even if it is at my expense · birds chirping in the morning before anyone but me is awake · a good cup of coffee · feeling how much someone loves me just by the way he looks at me · and my list goes on… By looking at life in the simple terms we identify on our list of “perfects” makes perfection so much easier to achieve. Imagine a week of perfect days. It’s up to you to change your idea of perfect and choose to live your life in perfection redefined. You get what you set your sights on. You only see what you look for. Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinions; it is easy in solitude to live after your own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.” It’s your turn…contemplate your own idea of perfection.

PEACE OUT. PASS IT ON.

Be a blessing...

Along with your morning cup of coffee some of you made transfers while checking your bank accounts online, grabbed your keys and headed out for the day’s groceries. Annoyed with the long lines you jumped behind another rushed patron at the ‘self check out.’ Nothing wrong with that. I do it all the time. But what is missing from those harried mornings are casual chit chat with a stranger, a chuckle with a cashier and simple human interaction. We have become a self-centered society running on hyper speed. Our focus lies more in technology than good conversation as our radios and ipods are programmed to exactly what we want to hear, we TiVo to cut down on the wasted time of commercials. Pay at the pump and even grocery shopping online makes life a bit easier but it’s cheating us out of the joys our grandparents’ days were sprinkled with…the blessing of personal contact. Even caller ID keeps us from answering the phone if the person on the other end tends to be chatty and we are headed out the door to the next thing on our “To Do” list. Years ago, I watched my grandfather head out to the post office; he was not in a car with his windows rolled up and a Bluetooth in his ear. He was on foot, calling to his neighbors and throwing up a wave from dew-sprinkled sidewalks. His day was laid out with friendly banter planned into it. He didn’t know who would stop by to chat as he repainted his garage door or mowed his lawn, but he welcomed the interruption. Personal contact was on his “To Do” list. “Stop in to see if Mary needs help with the lawn, go check on Hannah and make sure her air conditioner is still working.” I heard Vince Donnachie, a local pastor, once talk about the phenomenon of the ‘Front Porch.’ The gist of his message was that years ago it was the norm to keep connected with your neighbors and revive the heartbeat of your community each night on your friendly neighbor’s front porch. Vince illustrated this point by telling a story he had heard growing up. A relative had fond memories of seeing his grandmother’s front porch thriving with smiling neighbors and laughing children. This perfect memory screeches to a crushing halt as his uncle’s memory conjures up the day his family arrived only to see an eerie blue glow coming from the front windows. There was no lemonade, cookies or family on the porch and no one was playing outside. The few people who gathered sat inside mesmerized by the black and white television on a stand in the living room. His grandmother’s porch was never the same. The visits from that point on were done inside and were a lot less memorable. There is no substitute for human interaction. The children who are tormented enough to take out their sadness and aggression in the form of violence against their classmates are almost always reported as being “loners.” This is so sad. We didn’t hear about these travesties when my grandfather was leaning on a fence talking to his old friend mid-way to the post office. As we go through life we never know who we will meet or come in contact with from day-to-day. There is no doubt you have smiled after a store clerk commented positively on your child’s behavior or when a stranger helped make your day less hectic by reminding you that your coffee still sat on the roof of your car. Maybe you have been a blessing to someone by chasing after them with the bag of groceries they left behind or helping a child to find his mother in a crowded store. Some of you have been a blessing and didn’t even know it. These interactions cannot happen from inside your home while screening your calls or while punching in your P.I.N. number in the self check out. I guess the moral of my story is also a reminder to myself to slow down and enjoy the people around me; a reminder to take my new neighbor some cookies and stay long enough to chat. Unlike the houses of your grandparents, your porch is most likely on the back of your home, but don’t be afraid to use it. Invite your family and friends, open the door to someone new. Slow down and take the extra minutes to talk to a stranger, to make someone’s day or lend a helping hand. It will be a blessing to you as well. I have to go for now, my phone is ringing and my chatty friend is waiting on the other end.

**Contest news to be posted Sunday evening!